Ten Things I Learnt From Playing Final Fantasy XIII

Here's a list of ten things I learnt whilst playing Final Fantasy XIII

1. Linearity can be Good

Alot of people complained about FF XIII being very linear and they're right, it is very linear. That's not however a bad thing, it keep the game focused. It pushes the player through the story without them getting lost or heavily side-tracked. A lot of other rpgs are also very linear but people never complain about it with those games. Why is it such a problem to people in this game? The level design? Aside from the first chapter I didn't think the maps were all that linear.


2. People are Emo about Emos

Hope is such an emo, whine whine whine, all he ever does is cry, whine whine whine, he should just kill himself already.

Honestly? Hope isn't that emo. Sure he's mopey at the start but he's about to be sent away from his home to the world below which he's been told was evil and dangerous his whole life, his mother dies in front of his eyes and he's forced into fate people believe is worse than death. Anyone who isn't a little down after all that probably has something wrong with them.

After a few chapters though he begins a quest to gain strength to face the man he blames for his mother death. That doesn't seem really emo to me, that sounds like self improvement. By chapter 11 he's a determined young man with hope in his heart and a head full of stupid "We can win if we believe" speeches. People just like to complain about characters they don’t like, the whining sods.


3. Nora is a Stupid Name

For a person and even more so for an organisation and a revenge plan.


4. People can go Selectively Gray

Take a look at Snows portrait picture in the main menu. See his hair? Blonde. See his beard? Gray. The stress of Serah becoming a l’Cie was so much it’s prematurely turned his facial hair gray. Wonders never cease.


5. Random Noises are Annoying

Whoa, aaaaah, ooooh. Somebody shut Vanille up please. Let me just say I don’t mind her as a character. I’ve played enough rpgs to be used to kooky characters. She’s no more annoying that Yuffie or Rikku. It’s just those random noises she makes, it grinds on me. To be fair though she seems to really ease up on it after the first few chapters but still, they’re don’t add anything to a scene. Next time Square let’s stop with the high-pitch squeaking unless we’re being attacked by a giant rat ok?


6. Offhand Comments can Change Your Entire World View

There’s a chapter, I forget which, where Lightning and Hope are wondering through the food processing area for Cocoon. They speculate about the fal’Cie plan and how human fit into it. Hope makes an offhand comment that humans are like pets to the fal’Cie. Lightning then flips her shit like Hope just answered the biggest riddle in the universe. She completely changes her view on the situation, decides against her “let’s go kill the fal’Cie or die trying” mentality which drove her thus far and ends Hopes Operation Nora. When the scene ended one word ran through my mind, “What.”


7. Summons are Useless

At least in this they are. The only time I ever used them was to test them and be disappointed and as a cheat way of resurrecting my two fallen teammates. Such a waste of TP.


8. The Magical 20 Hour Mark Doesn’t Exist

Some people said that the game gets good twenty hours into the game. I want to know what this magical twenty hour mark is. Do they mean the start of chapter 11? How was that chapter so much better than the rest? Just because they gave you a big area to spend ages running across and some optional missions to do. If it takes you twenty hours to find a part in the game that you enjoy then you shouldn’t have spent all that time getting up to it and then complain about it later. Go play another game that you enjoy from the get go and save us from your whining. Actually this point leads me onto...


9. People Are Easily Amused

If you are one of the people that thinks the game gets good at chapter 11 then Jesus you are easily amused. All it took was one big open field and some missions that all consist of “Go here and kill this monster”. I was enjoying this game from the get to and actually thought chapter 11 was weak compared to the rest. The story took a back seat until the end of it and I was expecting more out of it. The way people talked about it being open I thought there’d be mini-games and more shit to do. Guess I look silly now.


10. Don’t Let Hope Make Speeches

I cringed whenever he gave some uplifting speech. The speeches themselves were very cliché and it sounded odd coming from the kid instead of the more world experienced adult characters. Compared to Lightnings “We’re here to kill you dead“ speech before the final boss fight Hope just looks like a rank-amateur. Silly Hope.